February 07, 2010

Andrew's Horn: Toot toot toot!

Back in my McGill Improv days, during Vaganza 2006, we played a game of Old Job/New Job (in which a character in a certain occupation performs his/her duties in a way that is influenced by his/her previous occupation, e.g. here), and for the scene's basis whoever was hosting selected, from the audience suggestions, a judge who used to be a cowboy. This was around the time that Brokeback Mountain was everywhere, and a punchline instantly came into my head — so I jumped up and barrelled through a relatively forgettable scene in order to get to the relatively hilarious kicker: "I wish I knew how to acquit you."

Ever since, that has been my improv glory story — the moment in a show that I always remembered most fondly, and with the most pride — and I still occasionally tell people about it. Last night, though, I think I may have topped it.

For Kitsch In Sync's February show, the tradition has long been to fill it with Valentine's Day/romance-themed material, and so Friday night we subbed our usual punning game of 185/187 with something called Pick-up Lines — in which an unwitting audience member is brought onstage and made to sit there silently while the troupe tries out pick-up lines inspired by various audience-suggested words.

About three or four in, our host called out "paper clips" as our new topic, and after a few seconds of frantic thought I came up with what I think is, in addition to being puntastic, actually a pretty legitimate line:


"Hey baby, I hope you brought paper clips with you, because we're going to have some trouble keeping our sheets together tonight."

Thank you, folks. I'll be here all week.

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