April 22, 2009

Boom and Busts

From AOL News: Economic Crisis Hits German Sex Industry

Place your bets now on how many double entendres I can massage out of this article (that one doesn't count).
In one of the few countries where prostitution is legal . . . the industry has responded with an economic STIMULUS PACKAGE.
Okay, that was a little easy, but still: TWO.
[Karin Ahrens, manager of the "Yes, Sir" brothel in Hanover] told Reuters revenue had dropped by 30 percent at her establishment while TURNOVER had fallen by as much as 50 percent.
Wait, so people are only doing it in the missionary position, now? (THREE.)

Here's another easy one:
Anke Christiansen, manager of the "GeizHaus," said the effects of the economic crisis were clear. "The regular customers who used to COME by two or three times a week are only COMING by once or twice a week now."
Ecki Krumeich, manager of upmarket Artemis Club in Berlin, said . . . "Our philosophy is: we provide an important service and even in a recession there are some things people won't DO without."
Indeed, some people just won't DO at all. (SIX.)

And now, my favourite:
Amateur prostitutes — mostly women with low-paid careers — [are] increasingly turning to prostitution TO MAKE ENDS MEET.
SEVEN. Splabango!

If you guessed I could make seven double entendres, congratulations. You win another double entendre. Oo-er.

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