November 14, 2007

Insufferable Highbrow Humour

I was walking through Chinatown yesterday and I passed a hair salon called "Dada Hair Styling," and I thought: why would anyone want to go to a Dada hair stylist? It seems like it's just asking for trouble.

--

CUSTOMER: Hello, I'd like a haircut please.

MARCEL DUCHAMP: Non! I will give you an anti-haircut!

CUSTOMER: Um, well… I was thinking maybe just clean up the back and sides and take a little off the top?

MD: Why do you cling so stubbornly to your bourgeois ideals of "back" and "top"? You must reject such notions! I will trim the false consciousness of your hair! Its superstructure! Its praxis!

CUSTOMER: Okay, but, um, I have my annual review on Monday and I'd kind of like to look my best for it, so…

MD: Look your best?! Pfah! Only by rejecting the aesthetics inflicted on you will you truly make headway in society. I will give you a haircut that screams, that insults, that calumniates! Then you will destabilise traditional modes of evaluation and any basis for review will be rendered irrelevant!

CUSTOMER: Ah, well, perhaps—

MD: [Puts a blonde costume wig on CUSTOMER's head] Magnifique!

CUSTOMER: I knew I should have gone to the Neo-Classical Hair Salon.

[Fin.]

3 comments:

Claire said...

That's quite funny, but I thought Dada was more like
--

CUSTOMER: Hello, I'd like a haircut please.

TRISTAN TZARA: ANTI-HAIRCUT BOURGEOISIE FIRE THREE OVER IRRELEVANT KILLS TRIM AT AESTHETICS FOR IN TRIBUNE A HOBOKEN!

Mariana said...

<3

jj said...

ur sense of humor is pathetic....what ur wrote here shows u r probably a racist...try harder next time...just a little suggestion...u need to use ur brain when u write, even something like this...

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