June 28, 2007

I Don't Want To Alarm Anyone, But...

I think the universe is beginning to revert back to an earlier state of existence, circa 1995. Consider: Tony Blair is not the Prime Minister of Britain; Paris Hilton does not appear anywhere in US Weekly magazine; The Spice Girls are going on tour. It's beginning to get creepy.

If we're not careful, we might find ourselves flung backwards through spacetime into the mid-Nineties. Plaid shirts will be everywhere! The Republicans will control Congress!! We'll all have to start watching Friends again!!! BLOGS WILL CEASE TO EXIST!!!!!

People, I urge you, we must take action to prevent such a catastrophe! Go, now, and destroy all of your Nirvana albums and DS9 tapes! Burn your Magic: The Gathering cards! Delete all copies of Netscape from your hard drive! The more we annihilate of the mid-Nineties now, the better our chances of remaining safely in the 21st Century! Life as we know it depends on you!!!

[Fin.]

Does anybody appreciate the fact that the only cultural references I can think of from the mid-Nineties are Star Trek, Magic, and Netscape? I was a pretty lonely kid.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'm re-watching DS9, it holds up.
KingCasey

Andrew said...

Laughing is happening out loud.

Okay, good call. Burn your Babylon 5 tapes instead.

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